Thursday, September 2, 2010


What once was closed up has now been opened... flood gates that is. I go from being insecure about my body and finally crying to hubby about it to then crying in true, heart wrenching pain, for a friend who lost her love this morning in Afghanistan.

I don't know what to tell her other than I'm here for her. I wish she were close enough that I could hug her, cry with her, eat Oreos with her, whatever she wanted. I feel helpless to assist someone who feels a worse kind of helplessness. My heart just keeps breaking for her....

I can't stop thinking about losing hubby or just how my friend might feel. How can she breathe? How much anger for God much she feel? What can myself and all the many other loved ones of hers do to help her be at peace with what has happened???

Strange sidenote. I'm writing this at dusk on my porch and I saw these GIGANTIC moth creatures. Well... looking for closely at how fast their wings were moving and their gravitation to our flowers, I realized they were hummingbirds. Oh pretty, right? Well... yes.... and cool to hear the hum.
But I didn't realize they would come. We have these flowers that only bloom at night. And when the flowers are out they release the sweetest smell that radiated for from it. I always wondered... why at night? Well... looks like the powers that be had a reason.. it's for the hummingbirds.
Everything in life seems to have a reason. I hope we can all find the reason for this tragedy soon enough.

Chrissy, I love you. I hope the tears that I have shed will help lessen the amount you have to. You are in my prayers, and I don't think any of us are given obstacles we don't have the strength to overcome. May you find peace through this chaos...

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